Learn to enjoy the fleeting moments of rare pleasure. The moments of cool euphoria that settle secretly and silently upon your heart like comforting snow. That makes you ache for time to melt into oblivion, so that the feeling may remain within you eternally.
The car rode in darkness as the headlights cast blank shafts of light upon the pavement ahead. The barely discernible whisper of the radio haunted the otherwise silent car. I sat in the back seat pretending to watch the scenery pass by the window. In actuality my eyes stared into space, for my mind lay anchored to one thought, one hope, one tormenting desire. May be obsession was the wrong word but I desired her, and her affection. She sat opposite me, the middle seat between us a vast ocean of opposition, a brick wall of torture. Though an unyielding storm raged in my heart and the mutiny of a thousand pirates careened in my head she sat clueless of my hell, clueless of my desire and at peace with herself.
From in the reflection of the window I could see her.
May by it was a false obsession but regardless I knew what fueled it. Contrary to your first impression it was not lust, but nor was it love. It was a lack of affection, the lack of a comforting embrace. I wanted our fingers to intertwine, her head upon my shoulder, the wisps of her hair soft upon my cheek.
Unfortunately all of my previous attempts during such opportune times had met with failure. So each subsequent moment that ticked slowly by in the car was soaked in pessimistic desperation. The great unknown, the last hope continued to sting like the fresh prick of a lovelorn rose. Only the sting grew exponentially in the car’s dull hum, tormenting me, mocking me, deceiving me. Till the walls of desire collapsed upon me, crushing me, grinding my skull to fine dust. So I leapt from my house of cards into the unnerving abyss of chance. Softy my fingers settled upon hers and I held my breath for a sign.
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